a new home

i've lived in this house for almost a year and a half. i have to be out by june 30th. i know that's a long time from now, but it doesn't seem like it. plus, i think i'll probably start moving in may, so i can be moved out before my finals.
i don't think i like moving. i've had to move three times before. but i guess this is just a small move, from one street to another.
finding a one bedroom/bachelor apartment that's under $600 isn't as easy as i thought. i might need to get a room mate. which i'm not very happy about. i don't like living with people. i'd much rather live on my own.
but i guess one person couldn't be that bad. makes things a lot more affordable. my friend louise is always talking about moving out of antigonish. maybe i can convince her to move here.

in the mean time, if anyone knows of any bachelor/one bedroom or MAYBE a two bedroom apartment that will be available in may, or possibly april, let me know.

the internet didn't respond

is it considered assault if you spit in someone's face?
it's not really harming them. there's no physical damage done.
it's just a big wad of saliva in their eye.

i tried looking it up, and all i could find was a story about a vietnam veteran arrested for spitting on jane fonda.
that doesn't really count though, because she's a celebrity, and celebrities can do whatever they want.

anyway, i'm just curious.

online surveys. the newest drug craze.

TEN songs off the top of your head.
1. i don't wanna die
2. half day closing
3. white light/white heat
4. submission
5. friday night, saturday morning
6. me-jane
7. in a manner of speaking
8. china girl
9. how to disappear completely
10. creep

NINE favorite places.
1. chester
2. someone else's house
3. my bed
4. gus' pub
5. with my mom
6. chester
7. the first turn off into town, in antigonish
8. the highway to get to chester from east chester
9. chester

EIGHT favorites.
1. my cat, edie sedgwick
2. macdonald. special light, king size
3. my friend jen
4. my 'creep' tattoo
5. last wednesday
6. mohawk
7. my birthday
8. other people's bithdays

SEVEN favorite memories.
1. when my dad introduced me to people as his little girl. last year at christmas
2. jen,heather,jared, brax and i going to the lake
3. mike d and i on mushrooms outside heather's house
4. sleeping in godwin's basement with meghan after the robot party
5. when i was in les miserables. and in oliver! for festival antigonish
6. my first date with patrick. when we got stoned, watched a movie, then threw a computar monitor off a bridge to see how thick the ice was.
7. when i went to see patrick in PEI and i got off the bus. i had been sitting next to this lady on the bus who was going through a terrible divorce. she must have been in her late 50s. i told her i was going to visit my boyfriend, and she got all sentimental. when i got off the bus, pat found me and gave me a huge hug and kissed me. i saw the lady looking at us with a big stupid grin on her face.


SIX dates that are important to you.
1. june 9th
2. july 12th
3. september 6th
4. december 29th
5. may 28th
6. august 25th

FIVE things you want.
1. to be healthier
2. to stop being stupid
3. to know how to play bass
4. a boy who will read to me
5. my parents to be happy

FOUR things you've done today.
1. slept
2. smoked
3. fed my cat
4. played online tetris

THREE cities you've been in.
1. halifax
2. calgary
3. moncton. does moncton count? if it doesn't, i'll combine charlottetown and moncton.

TWO tv shows you watch.
1. the simpsons
2. america's next top model

ONE thing you should be doing right now.
1] getting ready for class.

someone told me these things were therapeutic.

because they make you think of yourself. i would say that's selfish, but i guess one has to take themselves into consideration sometimes.

here we go.

1.What is in the back seat of your car right now?
i don't own a car. but when i drove a car, the backseat was usually covered in cds, toys and garbage

2. What and when was the last thing you threw up?
today. i threw up water

3. What's your favorite curse word?
cunt. or shit

3. Menthol or regular cigarettes?
regular

4. What is your favorite episode of Friends?
when rachael does laundry for the first time

5. Does anyone have any blackmail on you?
probably

6. If you could marry any celebrity today who would it be?
sylvester stallone

7. Have you been to a strip club?
no

8. Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?
a portrait my friend rachael drew of me on pink butcher paper

9. Are you wearing socks right now?
yes. tube socks. they're really dirty

10. What was the last thing you had to drink?
water

11. What are you wearing right now?
a black dress, black long johns and a black sweater

12. Last food you ate?
popcorn

13. Have you bought any clothing items in the last week?
no

14. When is the last time you ran?
the last time it rained

15. What's the last sporting event you watched?
golf. with my father. ages ago

16. Last movie you saw?
the craft

17. Who is the last person you sent a message to on myspace?
derrick. it was a lovely message

18. Ever go to camp?
yeah. a couple of times. i can't remember the name

19. Were you an honor roll student in school?
no, i wasn't. i was awful in high school. i barely graduated. i remember we were given these cards at the ceremony with our names, awards, scholarships etc. we had to give them to the guidance conselor when we got onstage. mine was empty, except my teacher gave me a special sort of honours thing for getting the highest mark on my provincial exam. i think i had a 60 in english or something.
i wrote 'great achievements in mediocrity' on my card, and my guidance conselor ALMOST read it.

21. Do you have a tan?
no

22. How old do you want to be when you have kids?
i don't want to have children ever.

23. Have you ever drank your soda from a straw?
all the time.

25. Are you someone's best friend?
i believe i am

26. What do all your ex's have in common?
they were always older than me. they all liked skateboarding and bacon. they all did a lot of drugs. my dad hated all of them

27. Where is your dad right now?
in antigonish

28. What was the last thing you said?
'bye'

29. What color is your watch?
black

30. What do you think of when you think of Australia?
those things in trees

31. Ever ridden on a roller coaster?
maybe. i can't remember.

32. Three words that describe you?
i'm finding it hard to define myself lately without being self deprecating. i'll give it a shot.
musical. un-naturally brunette and blue-eyed.

33. Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru?
either or

35. What is your favorite number?
14

36. Ever been in love?
sure

37. What happened to you in 1993?
i cut all my hair off with craft scissors and was attack by pigeons

38. 1995?
my brother cut the top of my finger off

39. Does your first memory involve your dad?
probably.

40. Biggest annoyance in your life right now?
it's kind of cold in my room

41. Do you like watching a bonfire?
no. it hurts my eyes

42. Are you allergic to anything?
antibiotics. MSG apparently. a few other types of medicine

43. Favorite shoes of all time?
umm, my boots i guess.

44. What is one thing you've learned about relationships?
that when a bo breaks up with you, you're allowed to wear sweat pants for a month and no one can say a word to you about it

45. Are you jealous of anyone?
sure

46. Is anyone jealous of you?
i don't think so

47. Do you ever take medication to fall asleep?
i take seditives most nights

48. What CD is in your stereo?
nothing is there right now. the CDs piled on top of my stereo are:
the unicorns-who will cut our hair when we're gone?
a/v-hot action
juan love-the dawn of paradise awaits
dog day-thank you
pj harvey-to bring you my love

49. Do you do your own dishes?
occasionally

50. Would you date anyone covered in tattoos?
if they were nice

i'm a mess

this isn't just another ending to something that never began. i think this is my last straw.
i think i'm done trying. i think i'm finished.
yeah, i think so

maybe i'm smoking too much, and playing too much online tetris, but i feel gross.

i had a wacky dream last night. it involved the guys fixing my computar. they became my best friends after all of my current friends told me they didn't actually like me. towards the end of my dream, i went on a date with the boy i have a crush on.
and by 'a date' i mean we watched disney movies in my living room/kitchen, then made out. he didn't sleep over, because my room was messy and he was afraid of my room mates. so he walked home.

cooking

i'm baking bread tonight. foccacia bread to be exact.
i'm also making salad dressing. poppyseed salad dressing to be exact.

i think it will be fun. although i'm feeling lousy and really shaky today. today's a bad day.

i'm going to make a big dinner tomorrow night. both the bread and the salad dressing will be featured. along with med chicken, mango and spinach salad and maybe roasted red pepper soup. we'll see how ambitious i'm feeling tomorrow.

if i had a hundred eyes, i would use them all on you

what a lousy day.
i don't like feeling like a moron.
or feeling like death.

10am-woke up. i don't know what time i got home last night. i had a bath for some reason

10:40am to 11;30-straight vomiting. it was funny, i kept kind of wishing someone was taking pictures of me. i could have some great pictures of myself on the bathroom floor, mohawk bent to one side, wearing a towel, puking.

11:30 to 12-attempting to smoke a cigarette and throwing up some more. i lost my lighter, so i had to go upstairs and light my smoke on the stove. then lying in bed in my towel listening to the cd a boy gave me last night.

12:05-called kelsey to get some reassurance that i wasn't a creep last night. i shouldn't drink on an empty stomach. and with no sleep. and when i haven't taken my medicine all day.

12:30 to 1:30-i think i might have slept?

1:30 to 1:50-another attempt at smoking sans puking. no dice.

2pm-got dressed and dried my hair.

2:30-felt a little better. drank a lot of water. threw up.

3pm-successfully smoked a cigarette sans puking.

now-kind of just sitting around. maybe i'll go pick up my sweaters at kelsey's. but i'm kind of nervous.




why? who knows

breakfast

when i was in antigonish, i ate breakfast everyday. i never realized how much i missed breakfast.
since i've been back in halifax, everyday has started with breakfast.
yesterday i had brunch with newwave and i ate french toast for the first time in ages.

i think i'm going to treat myself to some mcdonalds breakfast this morning. it's the hashbrowns. no one understands how lovely they are.

this post required a lot of effs. the eff key broke off of my laptop. annyoing? yes.

1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14 effs

oh, there's two more.

dammit